Prime Minister of lalaland

Just came back from a meeting during which I kept screaming in my head "who gives a damn" and fantasising about taking over the world and de-globalising it. Everyone would go back to planting their own food, spending the whole day with their family, cooking and baking from scratch...ah, the good old days. The simple life, that's what I want. Hmmmm, now that I'm on a roll and trying to avoid doing actual work, this is a list of things I would do if I were Prime Minister of Malaysia (all part of thinking small first, planning to do up the list of things I would do if I were queen of the world on another day when I want to avoid work). ANYWAY, here is my action task list as PM:

1. Really widen the rail transit network - I am so damn sick of bus drivers treating the buses like their own personal vehicles and showing up whenever - if ever - at the bus stops, especially when it's raining. I also have my own personal prejudice against bus drivers because a few years ago one of them crushed my new toscano handbag - the one I bought with my own blood and sweat and tears- with the stupid bus door, all because he was too busy staring at the cleavage of the girl in front of me. I am also damn sick of taxi drivers who never stop for me or refuse to take me where I want to go because of traffic jam - you're a freaking taxi driver, for God's sake! A car for hire! I'm paying you to drive me! And you go and act like it's some huge favour if you let me in your taxi. So that's my number one priority - get more trains, make them cheaper and get everyone to use them as the number 1 public transport. I don't see the point of widening the roads, which is what we seem to be fond of doing here, the number of cars will only continue to increase over the years, what's the point of wasting billions on the road, only to have it jammed up again in a couple of years when those same billions can be pumped into rail transit.

2. Outlaw motorcycles. There's too many of them swerving around, risking their own lives and my car for me not to outlaw them. The only kickback is, there goes my grassroot votes for the next election...ANYWAY, onto the next agenda:

3. Increase maternity leave to 6 months and gradually to 12 months, but only the first 3 months will be paid leave. After that, it's the woman's right to take the remaining months off but on an unpaid basis.

4. Make it fun to learn in schools again. More activities and projects and field trips, less exam-based memorising but not understanding type of learning. I look at schoolkids today and wonder where the joys of being a kid has gone to. Have you seen their bags? Have you heard about the amount of homework they get? And this is just kindergarten!

5. No more outriders for any minister or royalty. You are the country's leaders. You should get stuck in the traffic jam like the rest of us. The only downside is that if I'm PM, that means me too...sigh.

6. Review allowances given to royalty. Why is it we are giving them money when we're not paying more to policemen, firemen, army who risk their lives.

7. I'm running out of steam here....Lulu, any more you want to add?